32 Things You Will NEVER Hear A Woman Say

1. "What do you mean today's our anniversary??"

2. "Can we not talk to each other tonight? I'd rather just watch wrestling on TV."

3. "Ohh, this diamond is WAY too big!"

4. "Can our relationship get a little more physical? I'm tired of being just friends."

5. "Honey, does this outfit make my butt look too small?"

6. "Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how to get there."

7. "I don't care if it's on sale, 300 dollars is way to much for a designer dress!"

8. "Hey, pull my finger!"

9. "Honey... why don't you take a regular "boys night out" with your friends?"

10. "I can't watch "The Sound of Music" tonight... the hockey playoffs are on!"

11. "Hey, buddy... Will you help me with the zipper on my dress?"

12. "I sure wish that Avon lady would leave me alone."

13. "I want to buy this cocktail dress because my best friend has one just like it."

14. "Here, let me show you how to fix that plumbing problem."

15. "No, I don't feel like going out to eat. I'd rather stay home and cook tonight."

16. "I love my hair just the way it is... I'll never change it."

17. "Housework is my hobby."

18. "I LOVE the smell of a cigar."

19. "It will only take me five minutes to get ready for the Christmas party."

20. "My favorite way to meet people?... Wear a short dress and high heels, go to the mall at night, and park in a remote, unlit lot."

21. "He ALWAYS understands me!"

22. "I LOVE washing dishes!"

23. "I wouldn't miss the "Miss America Pageant" for ANYTHING!"

24. "Childbirth isn't so bad!"

25. "I ALWAYS trust my husband."

26. "I don't need another pair of shoes."

27. "I sure do envy Hillary Clinton."

28. "Men really ARE smarter!"

29. "On our vacation this year, let's go baby seal hunting."

30. "Honey, why don't you take those smelly old socks off and I'll give you a foot massage?"

31. "I don't care if he gets me anything for Valentine's Day."

32. "Shopping isn't everything!"